Entry One: Video Entry

[themountie]

[The camera turns on to show what appears to be an actual cabin in the woods, quite small, but complete with a roaring fire blazing in the hearth. The man holding the camera is wearing full Mountie regalia, including a Stetson hat, and looks pleased as punch.]

My thanks for the accommodations, Admiral. It's rather more space than I need, but I'm sure I'll finds ways to fill it.

[There's a bark from offscreen, and the man raises an eyebrow and says, quite pointedly:] No. Not with Krispy Kremes. We don't even have a Krispy Kreme on board, as far as I know.

[He turns his attention back to the camera, clearing his throat.] I beg your pardon, everyone. My name is Constable Benton Fraser, RCMP. I first came to the Barge-- well, that's not important right now, but I'll be here as a warden for the time being. I'm very much looking forward to it. [Horrifyingly, this appears to be genuine.]

Comments

[themountie]

The Northwest Territories. I was born in Inuvik, to be precise. Do you know it?

[batmanschmatman]

Not personally. I don't spend much time in that part of the world.

[themountie]

[Have all the staring, George.]

Great Scott. Did you say the NWMP, Constable Crabtree?

[themountie]

Back...?

[ Video ]

[themountie]

[The answer is: quite crazy.]

Well, not exactly, no. He's deaf, you see. But he reads lips very well.

[themountie]

Ah, yes. Few people do. [HE MISSES IT ALREADY.]

[batmanschmatman]

What brings you to the Barge?

[19centconstable]

Why yes, I did. Our detective, Detective Murdoch, has a half-brother in the NWMP. He was able ascertain that a butterfly was not merely dead, but had in fact been murdered. Which is quite impressive, because butterflies are really very small, and don't make terribly good witnesses.

[themountie]

Well, the Admiral offered, and as I was coming off of an extended leave of absence, I thought it might be a... fun challenge to try this before returning to a more traditional posting.

[themountie]

I see. And you're from the Toronto Constabulary. You and Detective Murdoch.

[19centconstable]

Yes. ...And everyone else from the constabulary, I suppose.

[themountie]

And the year is...?

[most_feared]

Agent K. A pleasure.

[Formal and flat as ever.]

You need any info to get you started?

[themountie]

Very pleased to meet you, Agent K. Is that FBI or CIA?

[maybebatman]

[ And why wouldn't he? Clearly Boyd meant it entirely in earnest. ]

Well, I'm sure you'll get your chance to relearn it, if we ever drop anchor in, say, a Braveheart setting. Although in that particular case, you'd have to set the uniform aside and wear a skirt.

[most_feared]

I'm not affiliated with either. Just a warden at the moment.

[19centconstable]

Ah. I myself am from 1898, but that isn't the year here. I'm not entirely sure that it is a year here...

[themountie]

It's a kilt, actually. I'm not sure I follow -- do you mean we're likely to drop anchor in Scotland, medieval Scotland, or in the midst of the actual film Braveheart? Which was based on William Wallace, of course, so I suppose options two and three would be more or less the same -- although, I hear, with some critical differences.

[themountie]

And I haven't gone insane. [Is this a question or a reassuring statement, Fraser?]

[themountie]

I see. Are all wardens referred to as agents?

[19centconstable]

Not that I'm aware of. Why did you think you might have?

[batmanschmatman]

Wanted a break from all the snow?

[timesbureaucrat]

Welcome to the Barge, Constable. I'm sure your optimism will wear off soon enough.

[themountie]

Oh, no, not at all. Actually, I spent my sabbatical on something of an... adventure in the mountains. Exploring. We fell into an ice field, once. It was wonderful.

[batmanschmatman]

Call me crazy, but falling into an ice field doesn't really sound like my idea of a great time.